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    3/23/2009

    沉积

    不是沉殿,不是沉默,只是沉积。思念累了。想到累了。身疲体惫,不知如何调试。再整装出发,又怕了。心思摇摆,身体颤抖。似乎真的是落底了。就像不用任何气力自由飘浮,无尽深渊,无边苦际。可是,总奢望会有到头的那一天。或许会有的吧!但清楚的知道,不是现在,不是过去,不是将来。只是来来回回穿插在中间的过程。你赚了,你是富有的,因为你经历了。知道苦痛。无法超越,所以只好妥协。至此,生活别无它样。继续着它的继续。
    而时间还是这样一点一滴的沉积下来了。关于记忆的泯灭,关于感情的流失,却无关日日夜夜陪伴着彼此的生活。那些所谓的会恒古不变的真理,早就被现实打击的不知去处。无法投递的情绪,慢慢沉淀在心底最柔弱的地方,开出悲伤的花朵,结出艳丽绚烂的果。却始终不坠不落,悬挂心中,随时触痛。一如生活的无常。压力随时呈现,濒临崩溃边际的时候,反而有种宣泄的冲动。不过如是,何必苦苦压抑。生活又是为了哪般?如此辛苦,如此感性,如此默默期待又彷徨害怕。最终还是归于现实。无限积淀。终要沉殿。
    无处躲藏的悲伤情绪,刹那涌动的往事,透明液体肆无忌惮的弥漫在视线所及处。那个听我絮絮叨叨哭泣数时的人,只是在电话那头静静倾听。劳累疲惫的身体。乱七八糟的思路。无语。那么那么的难过。只是希望能有人陪我走走,在清冷的夜风中,繁华而寂静的街道间,借我肩膀,让我哭泣。要的只是安慰,希望得到庇护,哪怕只是一个拥抱,让人感觉温暖而安全的。那些疼爱。最终只能在冰冷的空气里哭到无能为力。眼角生疼。抱着的蜷曲着的膝盖因为长时间的维持同一个姿势而僵持。谢谢你。对不起。在疲劳过后的夜里耐心听完我的断言残语。不成章的故事,不争气的眼泪。最终还是留我一个在无尽的黑夜里独自哭泣。。。。。。
    生活的无限沉积,只是带来太多伤害。如果说,真的拥有曾经无法忘却的痛,那么,也只有你的温暖能够化解。
     

    Comments (3)

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    haze Mwrote:
    dear~I'm okey.Nothing happened.Nothing can be remembered.
    Mar. 25
    迪 李wrote:
    叶恋枝
    哪怕陨落
    仍留恋枝给的一抹朝阳
    哪怕腐烂
    匆匆谢过泥的芬芳
    哪怕无为
    奉献自己为枝成长
    ....
    秋夜以凉
    珍重
    Mar. 25
    小羊 姜wrote:
    haze,就让那些沉积随风而去吧。
    Mar. 24

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